How do I talk to a relative about their untreatable illness?
Thank you for your careful thoughts. I appreciate how understanding you are after a loss.
I am considering my father-in-law's approach to death and how to help him. Would you be willing to offer your advice in this situation? I want to help him to accept the situation if he wants to talk. He and I have never talked deeply - indeed he doesn't seem to talk about his feelings.
I know he needs to be left to his own feelings. At what point, in your view, should one draw a terminally ill friend into a conversation about accepting death, and how?
Surely it is worth it for the survivors to know what the dying wishes are and what they feel? That the person dying has come to terms with their life is also a consideration. How do you do that?
Too many questions? Sorry.
How do others cope with early dementia in a husband ?
My husband and I have been together for over 30 years. 10 years ago he suffered severe mental illness and made several suicide attempts. He underwent so many ect treatments and 3 years ago was diagnosed with dementia. He is still capable of doing most things for himself, but it's as if the on switch has gone off. My wonderful friend, lover, and support had changed so much. I feel very lonely. I find myself avoiding many things. Sometimes just doing the monthly accounts is the hardest thing in the world even though I always handled the practical things. Every now and then I'm struck down with inertia. It's grief, I guess. Wondered how others cope with this.
(Virginia Beach, Virginia)
My sister in law was diagnosed with type 1 lung cancer. By the time she was diagnosed she had brain tumors. I took care of her from January this year until June when she passed away.
I thought watching her die a little each day was bad but my grief is worse. I don't eat well, I don't sleep well, I can't seem to remember little things that just happened.
Emotionally I can go from one extreme to the other in a matter of minutes & the most frustrating thing is I don't have control of it, it has control of me.
I was hoping you can give me some advice on how handle the grief? Is it normal to experience all this? I have lost children, parents & grandparents but I never felt this grief before.
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